Tuesday, December 25, 2007

Christmas Day 2007

On this Christmas Day 2007 I am not writing to the general masses. I am writing this to those whose heart is shattered; to those who have lost a love; to those whose love has been rejected or not reciprocated.

Not everyone has this experience. There are those who live and die without ever losing the love of their life. They precede their love in death or they never fall in love. There are those who live and die without ever having their love rejected. They never fall in love without the feeling being mutual. Everyone’s heart is broken by certain losses. But not everyone knows what it means to have their heart shattered by these particular kinds of losses.

Losing the love of your life and falling in love with someone who does not fall in love with you are very similar experiences. There are no words to describe the pain. We use words like broken, shattered, and devastated but these words are only words. They do not capture the feeling.

I have had both of these experiences. I realize now how many people are hurting and suffering from these experiences. People in this world are hurting.

If you are one of these people, please give me a moment of your time. There is something I need to say to you. Be comforted to know that the love that you have felt for someone is the love that Jesus has for you.

We say it so tritely; for God so loved the world. We think that it only describes God’s intent or motive. We do not think of His love as the same kind of passion that we experience for the love of our life.

God created us in His image. We got this passion from Him. He has it toward you.

It is so hard to believe that God loves us that way. It is not accompanied by any kind of sensual desire but the passion is the same.

This first donned on me when I was just a teen. It released in me a torrent of praise and passion for God that has marked my life ever since. I started loving Him when I finally realized He loved me this way.

Go ahead and believe it. The incarnation is sufficient evidence that what I am saying is true. The cross is another witness.

God never loses the love of His life. Death is just a door to a new level of relationship. But He does love many who do not love Him.

Can God grieve? The Holy Spirit can and the Holy Spirit is a member of the Holy trinity. God grieves when the feeling of love is not mutual. He understands your pain if you have lost your love or your love has been rejected. Because He loves you He weeps with you.

This somehow comforts me and gives me peace. I am not alone. The Sovereign ruler of all that we see and all that we cannot see weeps with me. Why? Because He loves me!

Because He loves you, He is weeping with you this Christmas Day 2007 if your heart is shattered by the loss of your love or your love has been spurned. You are not alone.

Jerry Wells

Saturday, December 22, 2007

My Birthday

The calendar has it all wrong. It says today, December 22, is the first day of winter. In this season of our lives, our winter began on May 3, 2007. It has been a long winter!

How long will this winter last? Some say it will last the rest of our life. That is a dismal thought.

I certainly expect to always miss Debbie. There will always be times of intense grief. But having times of grief and living in the winter of sorrow are not the same.

If you are experiencing a long winter of sorrow in your life, at some point it needs to dawn on you that you control when the winter will end.

You may not be ready for this. Your winter may have just begun. You may not be at a place where that you want the winter to end. That’s O.K. We all need a significant amount of time to just nurse our wounds. It is almost seems impossible to have hope for anything good in this life when you have lost someone so significant.

But if you are ready for winter to end, listen to me. There is a way to part the clouds and see the sun.

One of Debbie’s favorite Christmas movies was Scrooge. She liked the Albert Finney version the most. You know the story. A man is consumed with himself; consumed with preserving his wealth; consumed with his own needs and desires. His life is dismal.

He has an experience. He sees what life has been like and what life will be like if he does not change. He has to make a choice: live for him self or live for others.

Mr. Scrooge is so frightened by the experience and by what the future holds that He makes a major change. He decides to play second fiddle.

The moment he makes the change, the music begins. The story ends with Mr. Scrooge sharing all that He has with those in need. His winter is over.

Mr. Scrooge has a great hurt in his past. He allowed that hurt to make him Mr. Scrooge. Each one of us has the same choice. Live for your self or live for others. How long will your winter last?

Jesus taught us all this lesson by the way He lived. An abundant life is not found by holding on to your abundance. The bible calls it emptying your self for others. Will you?

I have been seeing signs of spring lately. It seems to happen every time I go out of my way to let someone else know how important they are to God and to me. I believe this winter is almost over.

By the way, today is my birthday. It’s O.K. My family started the celebration last Sunday at our annual Christmas brunch. I am richer because they are poorer. My children continued the celebration two days ago with another gift I enjoy. Yesterday, I got a call from a special angel and a gift from a new angel in my life. It is only 9:05am in the morning. I had a text message from the same angel waiting for me when I woke up. One dear family in our church has already called and sang to me over the phone. I have received numerous gifts through out the week. I have not counted the birthday cards I have received.

All of these people who are so dear to me are just practicing what I am preaching. It is wonderful to be the recipient. But it is more blessed to give then to receive. It can turn your winter into spring!

I am so ready for no more cloudy days. Join me.

Merry Christmas!

Jerry Wells

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Merry Christmas, 2007

The great preacher Dr. Adrian Rogers said a marriage relationship is the closest we can come on earth to what relationships are like in heaven. My experience with Debbie would cause me to agree! Because of the terrible conditions in my family as child, as a young Christian I had a dream of what a marriage could be like if two people would follow God’s ways. After a rocky start, Debbie and I began to experience the promises of God in our relationship. At some point in the last five years, our relationship became better than what either of us had ever imagined. Our delight in one another surpassed anything that Hollywood could manufacture. We experienced a romance that is only made in heaven.

God’s plans for us can take us to highest peaks and the lowest valleys. In my lowest valley, it would be easy for me to conclude that God must be very cruel. By following God’s plan for marriage, Debbie and I reached the highest peak of human experience. Then suddenly, God’s plan plunged me into the lowest valley. I know people who conclude that it is better not to marry than to have such a passionate love and then lose it. They seem to be saying that they regret they followed God’s ways because of the intense sorrow that is created by losing your love.

What could add to my personal resentment at God is a circumstance that could also be interpreted as an act of cruelty. Since Debbie died, couples are standing in line for me to marry them. I will do more weddings this year and next year than I normally do in five. I also spend six hours with each couple in premarital counseling. I will not marry a couple unless they are willing to do this. Hour after hour I talk with each couple about how to follow God’s ways for marriage. Every lesson is tied closely to my marriage to Debbie. I cannot share these lessons without remembering her and how I was so blessed. I speak to each couple choking on my sorrow thru out our meetings.

Then there are the weddings. In every single one, when the doors open for the bride to enter, I can hardly contain myself. I stand there at the alter, not as a 52 year old Pastor, but as a 22 year old college graduate waiting on my bride, Debbie Mills. I have performed every ceremony with tear filled eyes.

What is God doing? I know I am chosen for this. My first name means one who exalts Jehovah. This is for His praise and His glory. He has given me a platform and the ability to communicate. He then reveals to me what He wants me to say. Please listen to someone who has been with God. He is near to the brokenhearted.

I want you to understand how special you are to the one true God. I know that you may not feel special. Life is difficult! I do not have to explain. It is hard to see just how special you are to God. If it was easy, you would not need faith. The fact that you are so special to Him is a theme that runs from Genesis to Revelation. He has chosen you to be one with Him. He wants you to walk with Him for all of eternity. He has paid the ultimate price to fulfill His plan for your relationship to Him.

Besides the Bible, God sends people into our life who share His image. He wants us to see how special we are to Him by how we are treated by these people. There will not be many of them. It is easy to miss them and the message God is sending us thru them in the midst of so many who are not true friends. Then even our best friends may fail us at times. Don’t allow humanity to keep you from missing the message. God sends special people into our lives to show us how special we are to Him.

Debbie was one of those people for me. In fact she is at the top of my list. I have never been loved like she loved me. Every day when we awoke in the morning, one of her main goals was to let me know that day how special I was. Day after day and year after year she labored to do this. In the midst of all of her other duties she would find ways to communicate to me how special I was.

Then it happened. At some point, this became one of my daily ambitions for her. In the midst of all of my other duties I would search for ways to communicate to her how special she was. This sent our relationship over the top of what either of us expected from marriage. We couldn’t wait to be with one another in those private moments. We were living a romance made in heaven.

She also lived this way for others. First there were her children and grandchildren. She was always looking for ways to let them know how special they are. Then there was our extended family. Then there were our family friends and our church family. She lived her life each day just trying to let other people know how special they were. This is why she loved helping people put together their photo albums. It was not a business for her. She loved to help ladies show their loved ones how special they are. This is why so many people would call Debbie their best friend. What a brilliant way to live.

The last seven and one half months of her life she out did herself or God out did Himself. In spite of battling cancer and enduring such harsh treatments, her star shined even brighter. It was never about her. It was always about letting others know they were special. It was in her eyes, her smile, and her words. To be in her presence her last months was the greatest miracle I have ever witnessed. Person after person was touched by how special she made them feel. We received letter after letter from her admirers that all say a similar message.

This was God’s image in her. What Debbie became was just Jesus shining thru her. She revealed how special we all are to God! She revealed how special you are to God.

You are so special to God. You have the witness of God’s Written Word. You have the witness of the people that He sends into your life who shares His image, who treat you the way Debbie treated me. But above all, you have the witness of God’s son. The birth, life, and death of Jesus are an endless announcement that you are special to God.

Will you hear the message this Christmas season? Will you receive the message this Christmas from someone who has been with God? He is near to the broken hearted.

From the Wells family to all of our family and friends, and to all those who receive this letter from our family and friends.

Merry Christmas!